Friday, December 16, 2011

no sleep


i cant sleep.. aboodi has an ear infection and he should sleep in a sitting position for his ear pain to be "bearable" poor little thing..
its funny when i think about this blog .. i had it before having my own kids .. and i have always loved it soo much .. its now 6 years old! that is just something isnt it! it feels like my baby, whos all grownup.. its taking care of its self .. and im not around anymore.

ok now i sound like a horrible mother! lol who leaves her 6 year old kid all alone like that?

so anyways.. im writing this for my baby blog .. i miss u .. wish times were like they used to be before .. our old bloggers, talented writers.. beautiful posts to read .. the great friends we made.. al7imdellah untill this day were in touch.. u truly did change my life :*

"blogs changed lives".. u can quote me on that! it is soo true.. thats how powerful they used to be. a shout out to any of my old readers, bloggers .. most of u deleted ur pages with nothing to be traced.. bs i can remember ur posts like ive just read them today.. thank u for all the priceless memories!

take care guys!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

My Kuwait


i have been wanting to post for a very long time now , lack of both free time and inspiration were behind this long gap.

what can i say about the events happenning in my beloved country .. other than "interesting"
i open the news papers only to read how hypocritical some people "running" this country are.
scary to see how they dont have set morals or values, keeps changing according to who theyre dealing with and where they are?

very sad and scary at the same time.. i feel afraid because there is no sense of security anymore. i cannot assure my kids they will growup living in the same loving enviroment and atmosphere mommy and daddy enjoyed so very well! im 29 years old now .. i remember nothing but joy and love we had to our homes, schools and country.. and when i say country im talking about its government and prince. we are truly blessed . youd think after all the world revolutions.. and deaths and blood spill.. that the people here would look up and thank Allah for having such a peaceful country and governemnt.. no place is perfect and we do have flaws.. but we should always be thankful that the most important things are a given in this place .. sense of security and safety.. the law.. the people. we have a just system, we have jobs, we have homes.. we have a ruling family that treats us like family. alf al7imdellah.

i wish for my kids to growup under their care just like we all did .. i wish that people will open their eyes and stop being greedy. fix whats wrong.. starting with them selves. the ironic thing is how the people behinf all this "e9laa7" movement are the most corrupt! theyve been causing nothing but chaos to almost everyone.

all of this .. been blocking my brain from writing about the good and beautiful things. i never liked politics. but when its staring me in the face everydy.. as if its sitting on my chest.. stoping me from enojoying each and everyday that passes .. i had no choice but to let it out.. please leave us .. i miss the old days.. i miss my kuwait.

hope everyone is well.

Monday, August 15, 2011

the True grgai3an



grgai3an is one of the most beautiful traditions we have in islam.. sadly through out the years (specialy the last 10) its been turned into a showoff fest! people no longer do it, instead they simply dress up for it and thats all!.. instead they spend a fortune on creating the weirdest and the most none relevant giveaways as "grgai3an" which again .. has nothing to do with the tradition it self .. every year.. less and less number of kids rang our door bell for grgai3an. many families do small private grgai3an parties for some reason?! i even was invited to a "grgai3an party" this year that said "no kids allowed" on the invitation!!!! LOL WTH?!
we already have birthdays ,, noons,, and a3yad .. theyre all indoor .. the only unique thing about grgai3an is the going from door to door factor .. !? i really dont know why people are becoming so boring lol ?

this was Abdullahs and hamoods (my kids 3-1) first grgai3an in kuwait .. and since ive been trick or treating with them on Halloweens .. and since i know how much fun it is for all of us .. i decided to do grgai3an with my kids instead of an indoor party or sending them off with the nannies! (do not even get me started on handing kids to nannies!!!)

you would not imagine the amount of fun and bonding we had .. the new neighbors we got to meet .. and the encouragment we got from everyone we visited.. it was sooo nice and felt soo right and natural :) an elder woman came to me and asked .. are these your kids? i replied "yes".. she then said "bless you (allah ebarik feech mnn omm.. zaina tsaweeen wallah 3afya 3laich" her words made my day (hugs)

after our rounds.. i head back home. our door bell was ringing for more people doing grgai3an.. and guess what i saw .. a young mother with her kids doing grgai3an! was soooooooooooo cute!! and refreshing i totally loved her! mashallah 3laiha ..

so to all the families out there .. mommies and daddies .. give it a try! youur kids will enjoy it a 1000 times more if it was with u .. not to mention its the most legit excuse for u to enjoy these things again with out feeling silly about it! :p

kl 3am wnto b5air .. o 3asakom to3odon kl sina o to9omona ;)

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Ramadan @ Wilshire Blvd



Salam all..

its ramadan mashallah.. the beauty of the closeness to Allah in this month cannot put in words or measure. its a blessing that we make it from one ramadan to the next, and for that im thankful, its a blessing that all my family and friends are having this ramadan with me, and for that im most thankful :) alf alf al7mdellah. last ramadan was spent in LA.. some, very few americans wished me "a happy ramadan" which ill never forget because it was very kind of them :) also.. i and hub + abood would be cooped up in the apartment all day.. no zwaraat no grgai3an no qabgaat or graishat or tibareek shahr .. just my preciuos little family. it was kind of nice.. i miss that sometimes. we would break our fast on cereal sometimes.. frozen pizza from traderjoes and ofcourse deliciuos huge california dates with yogurt .. now when i see how huge each iftar is .. it makes me wonder if this is at all right? if allah would approve of it? .. we donate few kds to people in somalia for example.. but why would we spend this much on food to beggin with.. why these huge portions and all this variety?

other than all of that .. its all lovely here! its confusing how i feel home sick at my own home somtimes.. dont know what to do about that. i keep saying home is where my family is. and its true.. as long as they are around me.. im content .. and to all of those who didnt make it to this ramadan, i pray you are in a better place.. ur gone but not forgotten.. in my heart and thoughts always .. love u all (hugs)

Monday, May 23, 2011

an honest man



cement floors, cracked, cold, dead-very cold
i cant sit up; im afraid my skin will peal
everything hurts.
my bones wont heal.

im stuck in the dark, in the cold,
im beyond broken,
i loath the air.
the stench of ache and despair.

"9 years of what i ask?"
"9 years of what i ask?"
"9 years of who f*&$*@% cares?!"

i get up;
my knees dig through the solid ground
my heavy breath burns the crust of frozen air.
my skin suffers with thirsty viscous blood.
and my soul is weak,

i stand up on my own, my very weak own.
i look up, my neck hurts.
every f^&%$^ joint hurts
i see nothing. but "me"
im all i need to "see"

my heart beats, one beat at a time.
the sound of it is very beautiful.
cant "she" see?

-smile-

oh i forgot: "who f&*(&%$@ cares?!"

-im right here-

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

now i know for sure im getting OLD!!


it was not me turning 29 .. nor was it having to take care of two kids.. that made me realize/feel that im getting "old"
its when my cute little niece joined the blogsphere!! that it hit me!! man does time run fast..
this is amazing .. im astonished by the concept of time now .. dates, days and numbers!
alf al7imdellah .. im feeling pretty content and at peace these days .. enjoying my daily life, the simple things. trying my best to always be positive with a smile on my face .. to me i succeed in a day when i get someone to smile back :) again alf al7imdellah ..

the reason i posted was because of this girl "fatooma" my lovely witty smart and beautiful niece :*
welcome to the blog world 7bebty! cant wait to read ur posts :*

hope everyone is well ..
like always .. no3ik misses everyone so very much!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

home sweeet home




i have missed lkwait wahalha :)

Friday, November 19, 2010

Were @ War



al7imdellah my birth was just as planned, all natural no interventions or drugs ..
17 hours of contractions .. and Muhammed said hi to mommy, daddy and the world :)

first thing nurses did was ask me to breastfeed him, skin to skin contact. i loved how they were aware of all the things i have already read and wanted to do. i felt that the support system was very aware and strong here .. in my medical files and Muhammed files it stated with a red line under it (EXCLUSIVELY BREASTFED) meaning they will not take the baby for feeds at all. i requested he be with me in the room at all times, i did the changing, feeding, and burping .. they kept doing regular check ups plus bathed him :) which was super cute!


now the war starts here .. im back home, sleep deprived tired.. can barely fit time for my own meals .. im breastfeeding on demand .. so there isnt a time schedule that i can work according to... and i receive this in my mail box ..they sent "it" @ a time when they know a mother is most vulnerable at. a beautiful colorful envelope congratulating me and welcoming Muhammed with a very warm but greedy hug, from this very famous company (GERBER/NESTLE)!

i open it, it was filled with adorable gerber babies, Q&A section about their newly modified just like "breastmilk" formula!! ... but wait thats not all; a very generous gift a "CHECK" signed by them that is for me!.. my gift for having Muhammed? but wait..it gets even better.. the check can only be spent for purchasing their new formula!!!

isnt that INSANE!!! theyre not just promoting formula, its as if theyre at war with breastfeeding! how did they get access to my information to begin with?? how did they know i just gave birth? since they have all my info they obviously know im exclusively breastfeeding.. which makes me a target!

all of this got me thinking, formula companies push formula down babies throats to make millions and millions of dollars! they give free formula for new mommies, just to have them hooked.. seems kind and generous of them to do so.. 1 - 2 say 3 free formula cans that leads to buying the same formula can for atleast 2 years! now how generous is that! so why would any company endorse or encourage breastfeeding since no one is making money out of it!

its beyond sad .. and upsetting.
for the sake of our future generations, i really hope parents would read more and learn whats good for their kids and whats not.. instead of letting main stream media decide for (brain wash) them.

wish everyone is well.
missing u and kuwait so very much!

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Welcome to the world Muhammed :)

7amoodi 1 week old in this pic

on 19-9-10
@ 5:14 am

my body (by the grace of Allah) delivered a tiny new little soul to this world. my heart is full of excitement and love.. to nourish this tiny being with all that i have learned.
they say "its love at first sight" i always like to correct that because its not necessarily true. i think most people confuse (instant protective instinct) with love.
i immediately feel the need to hold and protect my baby .. but i fall in love with each minute and day we get to spend together .. bonding and knowing each other. love always needs to take time for it to be real .. it cant get any more real than this.

love u all.

Thursday, September 02, 2010

Muslims are Racist, Islam is not


a friend .. who was Christian converted to Judaism, then after more research converted to Islam. she says Islam was where all her questions got logical answers, it connected the dots and made sense. she was at peace and content with her life.

months later of practicing and blending in with Islamic communities, wanting to fit in with the faith she lovingly joined, she kept questioning the religion because of its people. she said: "why is it many Muslims do not practice their faith" and by practice she did not mean prayers and fasting.. those are the easy practices anyone can do .. she meant the other things.. the morals of Islam. the way we deal with each other. she kept seeing how most Muslims contradict with their own faith, talk the talk but dont walk the walk.

the deeper she got in to the communities the more shocked she was of its hypocrisy. and it had to stop at one point, and that was "racism" unfortunately, she discovered that most Muslim communities are racist, when it comes to where you come from, nationality, family names, and of course skin color (tones) she said it was very un Islamic and to her that was it. she kept trying to fit in .. trying to not let it get to her.. but at the end a community represent its religion and faith. she did not want to be part of that.

sadly, shes not a Muslim any more. she admits that she knows Islam is the right religion but she doesnt want to be associated with how racist its people are. shes still in search and hoping she`ll find a faith that does as it preaches.

i know for sure just as upset and disappointed she was of us, as a community, our beloved prophet Mohammad (pbuh) is 1000 times more disappointed and ashamed of our acts and racism. we are one of the most racist communities i think in most religions. we never like to admit it. were very judgmental, and love to set people in different groups, categories, label everyone according to very little meaningless things. that has nothing to do with islam or its morals and teachings. its purely shameful, and the most painful part is that we have no shame in feeling this way. when someone thinks hes better than someone else just because of who they are and where they come from, to me is ignorant and disgusting. stop this very backward and limited way of thinking and learn from your religion how to become civilized and open minded. Allah yahdee al kil inshallah.

its as simple as this: if Allah doesnt care where we come from, why should i?