phoneless .. homeless

thats exctly how im feeling right now. and it made me realize how sad it is that we grow so dependant on our phones/computers/gadgets in general .. theyre supposed to be there for us when we need them .. but not to live with them. my phone feels like my best friend whos beenn there every single minute and i simply lost that!
i feel like part of me is missing .. not to mention all the data!! phone book / appointments/ bbm contacts/ pictures and videos! its just too much .. we save a huge part of our lives in such a tiny thing.

-deep breath-

the last two years of my life been documented on that phone.. and now its all gone. i also miss my bbm groups .. i miss the ppl who i used to check their msgs first thing in the morning.. my tweets .. uploading pics on my fb .. all of that :(
its scary that i feel alone .. not to mention i cant make phone calls! LOL its sooo funny.. i havent had an adult conversation today at all .. been stuck with Abdullah all day, all i got from him is "no.. elmo..cookie.. maay and some other word" lol
anyways guys take good care of your phones .. my poor little phone is now for sure formatted and being sold on craiglist! i bet :@ hate them!

backup! backup! backup!

feeling romantic lately

been listening to a lot of love songs .. mushy stuff .. crying over kids cartoons ..
i know its my pregnant hormones i know.. i cant help but enjoy what im feeling even if it was temporary :( my (aaaawwwwwwws) have tripled.. i get goosebumps soo easily over silly things.
i dont know if your getting what im talking about here..in short:

i feel like im a teenager again LOL

and its sooo much fun .. to get all the emotional package of excitement and corniness with out having to be naive or u know a teenager! :p
ive been soo overwhelmed with these emotions that its been keeping me from blogging. i cant think sometimes im very easily distracted .. its fun! im not complaining im just surprised i didnt feel this way in my first pregnancy :p maybe this baby will be i dont know .. a drama queen! :p hope not.

anyways ..
hows everything with you guys misssssss u all of u.. so much
this is one of the songs ive been listening to, brings the biggest grin to my face for some reason!



:*

July 4th is a day ill never forget

i can still remember holding him in my hands after he was born @ 11 am
i couldnt cry, i coudlnt speak.. i just kept saying "sub7an Allah"
i was astonished by the miracle i had in my hands.

a miracle never stops being a miracle with time .. it just grows into a bigger one.
each child is his own mothers miracle. and my miracle turned 2 today :)

i love you abdullah with every existing cell i have.

alone

a heavy heart..
short breath.
pale skin..
dry palms.
thoughts that cause real actual pain..
the wish to dissolve.

just pause