she packed her things immediately after she heard the news ..
she left her responsibilities, her family, her room and her house she just left.
and came to me.
she said: "i wont leave u when
i laughed: "what shape? my mother just died! so what? im fine.. just go"
but she wouldn't .. she kept there by my side, made sure i slept and ate.
she stayed for three months!
we've been friends since 1988.
we did everything together.
she was that friend who u could stay with,
and do absolutely nothing and not even say a word.
just be there.
we then started growing,
we grew, we shaped ourselves.
as our personalities were stabling...
we were different, we are different.
she is my best friend, she is my BEST friend.
we were so different that even strangers could notice it.
im ok with difference, difference doesn't mean anything to me.
it doesn't threatens me, or bothers me.
one thing does...
she never said it, but i left with out even knowing
or plan on leaving.
i saw it in her eyes, "judgment"
she didn't like what she was seeing.
she didn't like what she was hearing,
i could feel her disappointment, i could sense her wishes.
she wished, i would change.
that is when i realized, different means apart.
we didn't just grow, we didn't just mature.
we grew apart. we landed on different grounds.
i haven't spoken to her, not in ramadan, eid or her birthday
we just stopped! as if we didn't exist.
all of this runs through my head every single night.
our memories are my new pillow.
sleepless. with guilt, anger and regret.
best friends that dont exist. but are best friends whether they like it or not.
you was, are and will always be my best friend on earth.
ur not just my best friend, ur a TRUE friend, and i love u.